Maintaining a healthy and active sex life in later adulthood offers substantial physical and psychological benefits. Research demonstrates that regular sexual activity supports cardiovascular health, increases emotional intimacy, and improves overall life satisfaction. Contrary to common misconceptions, these benefits do not disappear after the age of 60.
Although aging naturally brings changes such as menopause, reduced testosterone, or lower estrogen levels—a satisfying sexual life remains absolutely achievable. Intimacy may look different than it did in your twenties, but the idea that older adults “don’t have or want sex” is a myth.
Many seniors even develop heightened sexual interest due to fewer life stressors retirement, fewer responsibilities, and no concerns about pregnancy
Sexual Activity in Older Adults: What the Research Shows
A 2018 study revealed that:
40% of adults aged 65–80 are sexually active.
Over 50% state that sex is essential to their well-being.
Many seniors even develop heightened sexual interest due to fewer life stressors retirement, fewer responsibilities, and no concerns about pregnancy.
Sex therapists emphasize that age-related shifts in libido, arousal, mobility, and energy do not eliminate sexual pleasure. Instead, they require new approaches, modifications, or exploring forms of intimacy beyond penetrative sex.
Experts featured:
Aliyah Moore, PhD – Certified Sex Therapist
Jess O’Reilly, PhD – Sexologist & Host of the “Sex With Dr. Jess” Podcast
Best Sex Positions for Seniors (Therapist-Approved)
1. The Spoon (Side-Lying Position)
A gentle, low-impact posture ideal for limited mobility or joint pain. Full-body contact enhances emotional closeness and relaxation.
How to do it: Both partners lie on their sides; the penetrating partner aligns behind the receiving partner for effortless, rhythmic movement.
2. Wrapped Lotus (Supported Seated Position)
A face-to-face, deeply intimate position that enhances eye contact, emotional bond, and physical closeness with minimal strain on hips and back.
How to do it: Partners sit facing each other on a bed or sturdy chair, legs intertwined. The receiving partner sits on the penetrator’s lap and adjusts the angle for comfort.
3. Reverse Cowgirl (Controlled Penetration)
Allows the receiving partner to control depth, speed, and rhythm ideal for consistent pleasure and managing joint pain.
How to do it: Penetrating partner lies on their back; receiving partner straddles them facing the opposite direction. Pillows can support knees and back.
4. Seated Doggy Style (Accessible, Low-Pressure)
Provides the benefits of traditional doggy style without knee strain. Perfect for those with limited flexibility.
How to do it: The receiver leans forward on a bed or tall chair while the penetrator stands behind and enters with full stability.
A classic sex position enhanced with supportive pillows to reduce pressure on the back and upper body
5. Missionary with Pillows (Supportive & Safe)
A classic position enhanced with supportive pillows to reduce pressure on the back and upper body.
How to do it: The receiver lies on their back. Place firm pillows under the hips and back of the penetrating partner to create optimal alignment.
Additional Sexual Health Tips for Seniors (Evidence-Based)
1. Expect Hormonal Changes
Common concerns include:
Erectile dysfunction
Vaginal dryness Solutions:
Prescription medications (for ED)
Silicone or water-based lubricants
Hormone replacement therapy (HRT) for menopausal symptoms (with medical guidance)
Over 50% state that sex is essential to their well-being
2. Extended Foreplay Is Essential
Therapists recommend at least 20 minutes of foreplay to gradually build arousal, improve comfort, and enhance orgasmic potential.
3. Sexual Preferences Will Evolve
With age, individuals may explore new erogenous zones or activities they once overlooked.
4. Communication Is Non-Negotiable
Discuss boundaries, needs, concerns, and desires regularly authentically and without judgment.
5. Incorporate Sex Toys
They can:
Reduce physical strain
Increase pleasure
Help reach difficult-to-stimulate areas
6. Normalize Anxiety About Bodily Changes
Millions share the same experience. Speaking openly with partners and healthcare providers can relieve anxiety and improve sexual well-being.
Discuss boundaries, needs, concerns, and desires regularly authentically and without judgment
